I am still struggling, and if anything, it is more intense. Mickey and I separated just over one month ago. We are doing really good work. Today, I am raw. I started my period again. I hate that I know those emotions are all part of the crazy that is today. If I think logically, I know that I want my marriage to work, I just don't know if it will. I don't know if I am capable of being the person Mickey needs in order to be happy. I'm scared of jumping back in and being right back here again. I'm tired of the pain and hurt. I'm tired of the mistrust. I'm tired of questioning if I am going to regret my decisions. In this moment, I'm tired of the cold I feel inside. It's never been like this before, but this time, I can't seem to shake it. How do you tell someone that you have lived with for 16 years, that you want to feel crazy in love with them before they move back in? I couldn't bring myself to. And it's sad.
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